4 years ago....

today, I held my baby girl for the first time. She was so little, just a little over 5 mos old and 0-3 mos clothes was big on her. She was so sick the day my Mom and I meet her. Who would of known, that she had Polio and was fighting for her life. For how long had she been fighting it? We will never know exactly, other than I do know she contracted it between 3 1/2 - 4 mos old. I will never forgot how she just stared at us, we had to stop talking so she would take her bottle. She was so aware of her world and everything in it. 

We don't really celebrate today, since today isn't our Family day. My Mom and I sat down with Keree and we told her about us meeting her for the first time. About how Grandma forgot to take any pictures until after Keree was already in Mommy's arms. We told her about how little she was, how at first I didn't think the Nannies had the right baby until I saw her face. Then we went about our normal day. Today with school, I have started setting a timer. Keree knows that she has to do a certain subject for X number of minutes and then we can move onto the next activity. Plus, I have to say, it helps me stay on track also. Since the timer went so well, we did a art project to end our day. Keree made a paper Perry the platypus.

4 yrs ago......We Officially Became a Family

4 yrs ago today, we were on day 20 of living in a hotel in HCMC. I had custody of Keree for 13 days at that point. We spent the morning wandering through the amazing Muncipal Park and then 5 minutes before 4pm, we got a phone call to be down in the lobby at 415p for our G&R. Needless to say, we never got cleaned up so quickly and we even had time to spare. So right around 5pm, after all the paperwork was signed and notarized, Keree and I were officially a family. We were so exhausted but excited when we got back to the hotel room. It was pouring down rain, so we ordered in pizza that night from Al Fresco's.

This morning, after we got up, we told Keree why today was so important. We looked at a few pictures and then we got ready for the baseball game. The news and internet said the game started at 1230p but the game really wasn't until 130p, so that meant instead of the gate opening at 1030a, it instead opened at 1130a. Since we were early, that meant we stood in line from 930a until the gates opened at 1130a. We enjoyed our time by playing with a string we found on my shirt. We did magic tricks with it, we made it into a ring and hide it. When the gates finally opened, we headed over to the Plaza. Since it was Sunday that meant it was Ice Cream Sunday. Before we found a table, we ran into Norton, the mascot for Ice Cream Sunday. Keree was so excited to see the penguin. Once we were at our table, we enjoyed our Cardinal Popsicle. They also announced that it was Norton's birthday, so they were also giving away cupcakes and ice cream cups to celebrate. When it was time, everyone sang Happy Birthday to Norton and then they started passing out cupcakes. I had a lime cupcake and it didn't taste very good (and I love lime). Keree choose a lemon poppyseed cupcake and it was really good. After finishing her popsicle, cupcake and ice cream cup, she headed over to the kids craft area. She made a penguin hat and she drew a picture on it's bill. It was of Norton, his birthday cake and a candle. She also made a cardinal bird. Since it was getting close to the start of the game, we took our seats. I have to say these are some of the best seats we have had in a long time. The only downside to them are they were in the direct afternoon sun, it was super hot. Keree did well but did have some sound issues, there was a Giant's fan who was making a huge scene and so there was alot of bantering back and forth with our neighbors. It was all in good fun but it did get really loud and she didn't like that at all. Since we knew Fredbird is only there for a short time, we left our seats at the top of the 2nd to go see him. We were luck that the guy who was Fredbird's guard, offered to take a picture of us, so we were excited to have a family picture of all of us together. We returned to our seats and made it through most of the game (bottom of the 7th) before Keree started getting over heated. As we were leaving, Got Milk was tearing down their stands. They had a special exhibit going on before the game but since we were already inside the stadium we missed it. But they were nice enough to give us each a Got Milk football.

Since every year we celebrate with the same dinner we enjoyed in Vietnam that evening, we always have pizza. The last two years, we have let Keree decide where we were going. Her 1st choice was the Pizza Company but we were too far away to go there. So her next choice was Chuck e Cheese. My Mom and I weren't thrilled with the choice but she was super excited and that's all that mattered. After we ordered the cheapest meal package up there (it came with 35 tokens), we claimed our table. Keree and I went to play some games, while we waited for the pizza. I can't believe how good Keree is getting at ski-ball. We also had to play Spongebob just so she could tell my Mom that she played it (my Mom doesn't like Spongebob). When the few coins we had taken ran out, we went back to the table. Since the pizza still wasn't there, it was my Mom's turn to go play games with Keree. We continued taking turns playing games until the pizza finally came. Keree ate her entire slice, which is good considering she couldn't wait to get back to playing games. When she finished her pizza, she played the Alien game. Since she loves astronauts and aliens, of course it's one of her favorite games. When all was said and done, we cashed in our tickets at the Ticket Muncher and went to see what prize Keree could pick out. She choose a cute little mini metal lunch box with the Chuck-e characters all over it. When we got home, we spent the rest of the evening taking it easy and enjoying what today means to our family.

Four Years Ago........

Four Years Ago....I woke up with my heart aching because everyday I had to leave my daughter behind
Three Years Ago.....I woke up with my heart overflowing with love and a stuffed kitty cat being tossed out of the crib at me, followed by "UP"
Two Years Ago.....I woke up to the sweet sounds of "MomMom, I wake up, Kitty Kitty wake up, MomMom, you wake up?"
One Year Ago.....I was awoke before the sun rose to "Mom I need a drink"
Today......I had to wake my sweet daughter up because she was wore out from the late night we had at the show

Four Years Ago....I stood at a window, smiling at the nice women behind it, little did I know she was signing and approving my custody paperwork
Three Years Ago.....I stood in front of a photographer with a big smile having family pictures taken to celebrate the occasion of becoming a family with my daughter
Two Years Ago.....I stood behind the camera trying to capture these sweet pictures of Keere in an outfit given to her by our Cousins MKay, A and B and the stuffed bunny given to her by Great-Great Aunt F and Cousin MLou at our baby shower in 2006
One Year Ago.....I stood in the audience watching my daughter sign God Bless America in the talent show at the County Fair
Today.......I stood and watched my daughter play the Goldfish toss game at the County Fair and saw how excited and proud she was when she won two goldfish

Four Years Ago.....I took a long taxi ride to see my daughter for the last time at the orphanage because she was finally coming home with me
Three Years Ago....I took a long ride in our car with my daughter to celebrate with our friends their new baby
Two Years Ago....We didn't go anywhere because of the high gas prices and instead enjoyed the fun activies we can do right at home
One Year Ago....I watched my daughter ride the Carousel for the very first time and she screamed bloody murder and begged to be let off
Today.......I watched as my daughter rode the Carousel for the second time in her life and loved every minute of it.

Four Years Ago today........My Life Changed Forever
Today.....And I couldn't be Happier

Lesson 30, Fair Day 2 & 4 yrs Ago

Four years ago today, I arrived at the Ministry of Justice for what I thought was some routine paperwork in the adoption process. I stood before a glass window staring at a clerk behind it. I saw her thumb through papers and stamp some of them. She was so very serious and all I could do was smile nervously, not knowing what was happening. I watched as the two Facilitators ran to this window and that. Then finally the one Facilitator came over and goes after you leave here you get Custody of your Daughter from the Orphanage. I was blown away, I couldn't believe it was happening, that I was going to get Custody. We headed to the Orphanage around 1pm, we meet with the Orphanage Director, signed some paperwork and then we were told to go get our babies. When I walked in, the Nanny had just finished changing Keree. When they handed her to me, she smiled and giggled. We took one last picture of me holding Keree and a few of the Nannies that were in the room. We then walked down the stairs, where we pasted one of the other Nannies from her room, she kissed her head and waved bye-bye. We were then handed some paperwork and whisked into a taxi to head back to the hotel. It was all a little surreal that day.

We got a late start this morning, getting back into the swing of show season is rough. Keree enjoyed lunch in her pajamas. I fixed her an octopus hot dog, spinach/zucchini/tomato/black olive salad and she got a few whole grain cheesy potato chips. She cleared her plate completely. We headed down to the Fair and we got to get in at 5p to set-up. We moved a few things around, otherwise we were pretty much set-up. After everything was done, Keree and I walked around. I wanted to get individual pictures of her items that had won ribbons. We also wanted to walk around and see all the vegetables and fruits that were competing for Best in Show and other titles. We were surprised to see that a Giant Pumpkin was the winner for Best in Show. When we got back to the booth, we went through Lesson 30, which was a review of the last sound we learned. Then, Keree and Mom walked around for awhile. They also went back to the stage and watched the World Bird Sanctuary perform a show with all their owls, hawks and other endangered birds. Keree loved it and really loved the owls. After the Bird show was over, they watched the Suzuki String program. When they got back to the booth, Keree and I went for a walk. Keree begged me to get to play the Goldfish toss game. So being that today was a special day, I caved, plus I thought there was no way she was going to win. So I paid the $2 for 15 balls and before I even got back my change. Keree threw her 1st ball and it went right into a bowl. I couldn't believe it and neither could she, she had won a fish. We took our time, she would throw a few and then she would hand one to me. We were always close but it never went in one of the bowls. She was down to her last ball, so she threw it and of course it landed in a bowl. So Keree is now the proud owner of two Fantail Goldfish. She named them Dorothy (after Elmo's goldfish) and Bob. She was so excited, that we rushed back inside to show my Mom. She was helping a Customer, so we had to walk around for a bit wasting time. So since she couldn't tell my Mom and she bursting with excitement. She got to call my Brother, they were so funny talking to each other about the Fish and as soon as Keree told him, she was done talking to him. When Keree finally got to tell my Mom she hid them behind her back and goes "TaDa". It was so adorable and we still couldn't believe that she not only one 1 fish but 2. After the show was done, we headed outside it was 2 for 1 night on the rides. Keree really wanted to ride the Carousel and this way whoever rode with her didn't need tickets because of the whole 2 for 1 deal. Keree did so well on the ride, she wasn't scared at all. So we decided to try another ride, since she did so good. My Mom wanted to take her on the Ferris Wheel but Keree told her that she thought it was a little too high. So in my brilliance, I suggested the tilt-a-whirl. The reason I suggested it, is because you aren't really tossed around all that much and in all honestly the spinning isn't that bad. So my Mom and Keree got on the Tilt-a-Whirl. Keree was excited until it started up, the noise frightened her more than the actually ride. By the end of the ride, she had her head buried into my Mom's lap. After that, we called it quits with riding rides. Since it was late, we decided to head home. Keree was so concerned about her new pets. I can't even count how many times she asked about them as she headed home. When we got home, Keree told them goodnight and we all headed to bed.

4 years ago - Meeting my Daughter

Four years ago, I got up super early. We went to eat breakfast on the top floor of the hotel, opting for Bread and Jam and then we waited. As the minutes ticked by, I didn't think the Facilitator was every going to get there, I actually think it was one of the only times she wasn't late. She grabbed a taxi and we climbed in the back seat. As we drove, she tried to make small talk, but honestly my stomach was in knots. I literally thought I was going to puke. My Mom talked mostly with her while I tried to memorize everything we passed. We passed by grocery stores, schools, a whole street filled with toys and baby stuff. As we got further away from downtown, the streets weren't as well maintained. They had huge potholes, I mean the size of a 15 passenger van hole. Then we pulled into an alley and we were at the entrance of where my daughter had spent the majority of her first 5 months and 10 days of her life. The Facilitator said a few things to the Guard and I uneasily smiled. We walked past all the Motoscooter the Nannies and Teacher drove and then we were in the main Courtyard. There was a small playground slide in the middle of it and a flight of stairs next to it. We climbed the flight of stairs and about half way up, I looked at my Mom behind me and said are you tapping this? We then removed our shoes and entered the Baby room. The Facilitator said a few things in Vietnamese to the Nannies that I didn't understand but I did understand my daughter's name, Ngoc. Suddenly, there was a Nanny walking my way, with this itty bitty almost newborn size baby. She had her flipped with her head down, so I couldn't see anything except her body. I kept thinking in my head, there has to be a mistake, there is no way that this is my daughter, they must have not understood the Facilitator correctly. I was really starting to panic. Then about 3 feet from me, the Nanny flipped the baby around and there was that face, the face that had been staring back at me in those pictures. Yep, that was my daughter. Suddenly they placed her in my arms and then within a minute they gave me her bottle to feed her. Now the funny thing was, was my Mom had gotten so caught up in the moment, she didn't tape any of it, she didn't even take a picture until a good 30 seconds after she was placed in my arms. We got to visit with her for a good 2 hours, she was so very sick, running a 104 fever and she didn't move her entire right side. I thought she had a mini baby stroke. We inquired about a few scars she had but they wouldn't answer, even though I know they understood. We went back to the hotel that day and all I wanted to do was get her out of there as soon as I could.

This morning, we layed around in bed until almost 9am. When we finally did get up, I told Keree why today was so important. We looked at some of the pictures and videos we had taken from that day. Once we were dressed, Keree insisted that we all have our hair fixed the same. So she got to wear a clippie to hold her ponytail up just like my Mom and I. She was so excited that we all matched. We headed to a Church Rummage sale a few towns over. This was another rummage sale that only had items and no clothes. Now I couldn't believe how many books they had. Now there prices were super steep, 25 cents for a soft cover and 50 cents for hard cover. By the time I was done, I ended up having over $15 worth of books. Luckily, when I got to the check-out, she goes I don't want to count these all, so how about $2. WhooHoo!! Keree and I walked through the toy section, most of the stuff was tore up and junk, but we did find a brand new Jumbling Tower (sort of like Jenga) for 50 cents and brand new Guess How Much I Love You game. Now Keree came across a sit and spin, she didn't know what it was at first, so I showed her how it worked. For a child, who has major movement sensory problems, she happily hopped on and started spinning. I was shocked and she exclaimed "it's just like the tea cups at Disneyland". We've never been to Disney but she's seen it from other people's pictures. She couldn't wait to show my Mom and my Mom was just as shocked as I was that she was spinning. Keree is usually allowed 25 cents to spend but we made an exception. Keree paid $1 for her Sit and Spin. My Mom's great finds were two Ikea leaves, they are so awesome and she paid $1 a piece. My Mom's other find was a brand new "K" purse for Keree, she paid $1 for it. When we got home, we played outside and went through the books we got. Once it started getting hot, we headed inside. Keree laid down for a nap, while I made Crock-pot Spinach Lasagna. Well I ended up being out of lasagna noodles, so I threw in some penne instead. I also added some zucchini to it. It was so good. The rest of our evening was spent working on Keree's stage backdrop for the Talent Show.

4 years ago and Lesson 28

Four years ago today, I had just touched down in Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon), Vietnam. I still couldn't believe I was actually there and then I was worried sick that Keree's adoption wasn't going to happen. We had been through so much leading up to this point. Keree was my third referral, this was my umptenth time changing my flight plans and when we arrived there, there was no one there to meet us. I was scared but oh so excited to be in my daughter's homeland and I couldn't wait to meet her. I've decided to repost on another blog our entire journey and most pictures while we were there, so please follow along at http://4yrslateradoptiontrip.blogspot.com/

This morning and afternoon, Keree spent time finishing up and starting a few of the entries into the County Fair. I spent my time mounting them and putting hanger wire onto them, both requirements of entry. I'm excited to see how she does with her entries. I wasn't feeling too hot, so I laid down with Keree for her nap. I actually think I slept longer than she did but she was good enough just to lay quietly next to me. For dinner, I felt like Mexican food, for some reason if I'm sick, I actually can keep down Mexican. Weird, I know. So, I made cheese enchiladas and topped them with black olives. MMmmmm, Keree loved them so much, she ate a whole big enchilada by herself. In the evening, Keree's cheerleading team was having a meet and greet. She told us to meet at the Press box at 6pm. We were there 10 minutes ahead of time and there was only one other Mom waiting. Well we waited, waited and waited. It was now 20 minutes after 6. Both of us were getting ticked off and neither one of us had the Coaches phone number. So she finally called her Husband to get the number. I guess, he ended up calling the Coach instead because shortly later, she called. She was no where even close to the Press box, she was in the back parking lot almost a mile away from where we were. Needless to say by the time we found her, we were both beyond ticked off. On top of it all, it honestly was a waste of time. She had no practices set-up and doesn't have the game schedule. The only thing she did do was go over the rules, which we've gotten and read copies now a good one hundred times. The other thing she did was complain because she's got a job and she's a Single Mom. Ok, I'm a Single Mom too and I own a business, so hearing her complain isn't going to fly with me! It was just super annoying to drag us out into 128 degree weather, stand on black asphalt for no more knowledge than we've gotten by email. Well and the only other comments I got was when the other Mom's asked where my daughter was who was on the cheer team. Needless to say, Keree is standing right next to me. So I go, Keree is the one cheerleading. The next thing I would hear is huge Gasps and then "but she's too young and little to cheer." Keree then would just stare them down. I on the other hand spent my time defending her. Which consisted of "Keree is not to young, she's 4 1/2 and she maybe small but she's probably got more spirit and heart than your daughter." Ok, so that wasn't nice at all but seriously, your picking on my daughter. This is going to be an interesting season! On the way home, we stopped and got an ice cream blast. They were only 99 cents because the Card hit a home run last night. So we enjoyed the rest of our night watching Wipeout, working on our school lessons (we covered lesson 28) and eating ice cream.